2010, Something New, Something Borrowed, I Don't Need Anything Blue

Okay, I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW, I always say I am going to start blogging then the ruination of routine inhibits my ability (actually more like my drive), to reflect on my thoughts, but I want to make a decent effort to start laying out my thoughts somewhere.

It's 2010, which is a great number (because 10 is half of 20!). I am hoping this is the year I figure it all out. I have one year left to my graduate program, so I need to know what I want to do with the rest of my life. Part of me wants to get out of Maine, experience something new, but then the other part of me is comfortable, and I have been really lazy lately. Part of that is due to being on Winter Break, but I really feel like this last year I have been full of mental and physical atrophy. I never went to the gym like I wanted to, I don't go out and do new things as much as I should, but I am hoping to alter some of that. Winter doen't help either. I feel like there is just some sort of weights IN my shoulders (hey, it's just how I feel, I can't help it!). BUT, it's time for a change, time to be proactive and get up off the couch and do stuff!

Part of that begins with going to the gym. I am going to start going with Beth (and whomever else chooses to venture, but probably only us 2 since we are going at the ass crack of dawn at 7:00). I am really going to try to stick with it, and try to alter my diet some too (not as much soda, etc.) While I was at the store last night I had some Dr. Pepper in hand, and I put it back to get orange juice instead. I just have to make small dietary changes at first, while working out then I can alter more if it seems fit. I guess the problem isn't really how much I eat, it's what I eat anyways. I need balance! Part of that balance includes a good sleep schedule as well. I go to bed way to late, and I really need to change that. I am going to start tonight. I will try to be in bed by midnight (have been going around 2:00am). I think that will change a lot about my motivation apathy, etc.

Over break I have just been watching TV and playing games. I beat God of War I, and I am very close to finishing God of War II. I have watched season 4 of Dexter and the first 3 seasons of 30 Rock. It's a really great show. It's funny though, I watched this "Greenscreens in Hollywood" video a few weeks back, and now I can distinctly tell when something is using a greenscreen, and it kind of sucks, it takes me out of the moment a little. Anyways, 30 Rock is great, so the rave was right. I did notice in a few episodes some funny things that happen though

In The Episode : Where Wayne Brady guest stars. Liz and him are playing Uno on her bed, and she goes Skip, Skip, Skip, Reverse, Wild! And pronounces she wins, BUT, she actually would have had to pick up cards because she didn't say UNO!

In The Episode : Where Dennis is a sex addict. At the beginning, Liz grabs her coat and goes to the door, kicks Dennis out, then closes the door. Why did she drape her coat over her hand like she was leaving? Maybe she just needed time, but seemed a little odd

Small things, but I thought the UNO thing was funny just because i'm a total nerd for noticing it.

Other than that things have been pretty mellow. I have been working 20 hour weeks at Student Employment, and I really think my time here is coming to an end. They gave someoene else my job pretty much, and their reasoning was "this is what she does", it was also what I did, and it just seems kind of rude to give someone someone else's job without really telling them, and then say they will be downstairs next semester. I do have one project I will be working on , but nothing too out of the world. It's just a bummer when you get weeded out for other people behind your back, it kind of hurts considering my boss, who I highly respect, didn't even have the decency to talk with me first to let me know they had given my job to someone else. Blah.

I have thinking about next year too with the graduate assistantship. I hope Raphael needs me again to TA with him because I don't want to take out thousands and thousands of dollars worth of loans next year, since I already did that to buy a car this year. Who knows! I need to be proactive if I want my last year of school paid for!

Okay, well, I am hoping I can use this to reflect thoughts from time to time, just catalog what's going on in my noggin. Happy 2010!

Unboxing Macbook Pro!

So I got it last night, and it's awesome. There have been no issues. It gets a little warm, but it sounds like it's about the right temp for a pro with :

2.8Ghz
320GB HDD / 7200RPM
4GB Ram

Enjoy the goodness :0 ! (click on pics to enlarge)


THE BOX, Taking pictures was hard, I wanted to just rip it open and make sweet love!





You can see my The Office poster in the background, although the only time I really notice the reflective screen is when there is a completely black background.



I am loving it (more than McDonalds)

EONS

That is how long it has been / felt since I blogged on this blog! I normally do not use blogspot anymore because I find wordpress is a shit ton better, so maybe I will migrate this blog over there if it is easy enough, maybe not. I would love to hopefully keep up on blogging again!

SO LIFE! A lot has been going on. Graduate School is going fine, although I feel like the program is a mixed bag, which may be good or bad, I guess we will find out. I have a total lack of motivation though, so I am hoping I get it soon. I just ordered a new laptop so hopefully that will bring some productivity in my life, since I have not so great work stations right now, and this will allow me to carry with doing some video and photography! I got a new macbook pro, which is super sexy. The only thing I am not super fond of (went to Best Buy to look before I bought) is the reflective screen, but I found a place online that has films to prevent glare, so if it gets out of hand I can get one of those. I also ordered an AppleSac, it's pretty sexy!




Not much else has been going on, I am thinking of heading down to Portland this weekend. Angie said she might go down, so i'd catch a ride with her on Saturday and come back most likley Sunday or Monday depending what plans are. I haven't seen Jeff since his birfday so that'll be fun! Also, there is a Shiny Toy Guns concert at the end of the month @ The Station, which is where I saw them last time, and they were pretty good live, and Carah was super hot, but now they have a new girl, but i'm sure it will still kick ass! Their new album is pretty good, it is taking some getting used t because it is really different in sound. It's still offbeat / different sounding but in a different offbeat and different different sounding way.

What else has been going on. How about an update on my love life? Okay, done!

Work has been decent, sort of boring for the most part, nothing too exciting, but I work with some great people and get to do a little designing and such, so it's not horrible! Connie is the best supervisor ever, it's great to work with her, she has always helped me out!

I am pretty sure I am going out to my brother's place again this winter. Seattle is pretty cool, minus all the freakin' RAIN all the time, but I like it there for the most part. He is telling me about all the games we NEED to play when I get there haha, so I guess we'll be doing a lot of that. It's just nice to get out of Maine for a couple weeks sometimes and just go do something random, and it's nice to see him as well. I am hoping to catch another concert while I am out there this time. Last year Harvey Danger was awesome, and since they are Seattle based maybe they'll be playing again, but it'd be cool to see someone else too. AWIM is based in Seattle too, so that'd be neat, but anything really.

Good movies I have seen lately include Quarentine and Zack and Miri Make A Porno. Quarentine far exceeded my expectations (as I have little for mainstream horror). It was perfect, it is what I imagined Resident Evil to be when it came out. It was creepy, realistic feeling, the only thing that blew was they show you the ending IN THE TRAILER, so I knew it was coming when it did. Zack and Miri was pretty funny. It had Daryl from The Office in it, so that was pretty awesome, but overall it was better than I expected as well (although I like Kevin Smith, the preview wasn't that great in my opinion).

Well, I suppose I should sign off for now. I will try to log on and update the blog a lot more often from now on!

Cream and Bastards Rise

it's been a few days, so HEY! First deal of news would be last friday. I went to go see 30 days of night, it was pretty awesome, I am still completely unsure of how I felt about it, but I loved the cinematography, which if a movie has a decent plot, and the movie is decent the cinematography can turn it around for me, and there was some amazing shots in that film. just thing bloody snow patches in a winterized town - that cool!



Other than that I haven't been up to too much. Astra and I sat in the union for hours and hours today and chatted, I needed a little Astra time, it was fun. We were in the "Memorial Room", it was hilarious, we played this little fun game called ; "Astra hides behind the door, and i signal to her when someone comes walking by, she jumps out and flashes a picture of them while yelling 'surprise, but then a bitchy girl comes over and is all 'this is a room of respect, quietness, and reflection, do you know the history of this room' and then Astra responds 'yes, i was trying to have fun' where she gets cut off and bitchy girl relates to her saying she is fun and would do it too if it weren't this room meaning she wouldn't because she was frigid' game. it was a pretty good one, we left after that, and I have been editing the videos for work. I have one done right now, I want to get the other one done tonight, then get the other one done before class tomorrow.

Besides those two things, not much has been going on, I have been trying to decide about graduate school, so I have been looking up colleges. I had a meeting for my scholarship the other day, and I need to start studying for the GREs soon. The decision-making in my life is becoming harder and harder, and i'm not focusing as much as I should, so I have been trying to put it off as much as I can, but I usually do well in figuring out when and how and all of that stuff. So hopefully it will all work out. Astra thinks I should leave, i'm not sure yet, I really do want to try something new, go "out there". I'm not sure what that all includes, it seems scary, but also very exciting.

Brian wants me to go out to Seattle for Christmas, he asks me every single time that we talk, I really want to, and if I do , I will go out and surprise him. I just don't know if I have the 500ish dollars to go out there, but it would be so cool, I could go out for two weeks, then come back, and i'm thinking of going down to DC with Astra. So, there's always that, I really want to explore, it is just getting the motivation to actually go and do it, but I should, i'll see what the money situation is like.

WELL, I guess that is that, we are going to see-saw for (Saw IV) a good cause of enjoyment of torture on , I liked that form of Double Entendre, it won't happen again the SAW FOR thing, because five and six are just numbers not also prepositions. Then on Saturday, I think we are going to have our Halloween party, which I am very unsure of what is going down already, but oh well. Maybe we'll drink, maybe not, I have no clue. I keep walking on eggshells about a certain subject in my life wondering constantly how to incorporate it in my life, it's becoming a heavy weight, and I don't know how to deal with it, but I guess I will figure it out eventually.

I guess that is it, that's what's been going on since last blog , OH WAIT TWO MORE THINGS

1.) LOVELINE ; it's still on. Its Dr. Drew and some Stryker guy. I was listening to a podcast last night, andy dick was on a few months ago, and he's hilarious so i was listening to it, i am going to start listening to it on a regular basis, <3line!


2.) Karen got my package, she loved it, :) yay, i guess that's all. I was scared because the delivery confirmation said it got to LA on thursday , but she said she got it Monday, so maybe it just hadn't been delivered to her place yet. She's great, and I am glad I sent it to her.

(cover for playground isolator)

I guess that really is it for now, nothing else besides those things I am sure...so there.

Sometimes

this is how i feel right now about my life

Shadows they fall on the stage of your own life,
Trailing behind footsteps.
There's comfort in ghosts who are no longer with you,
Hiding behind your death.
I let you down you've lost your taste,
I'm losing ground I fall from grace.
Well just listen,
Sometimes,
YOU GOTTA' SET FREE WHAT YOU LOVE JUST TO BRING IT BACK!
WOULD YOU EVER LOSE ME?
WOULD YOU EVER LET GO FOR THAT?
And if the love is real you gotta' let yourself go,
Just to bring it back.
Sometimes,
Just to bring it back.
Hiding inside my asylum I'm always,
Hanging on by a thread.
I can't ecpect you to respect me until I've,
Learned to respect myself.
I've let you down you've lost your taste,
I'm losing ground I miss your face.
Well just listen,
Well just listen,
SOMETIMES,
SOMETIMES,
YOU GOTTA' SET FREE WHAT YOU LOVE JUST TO BRING IT BACK!
WOULD YOU EVER LOSE ME?
WOULD YOU EVER LET GO FOR THAT?
And if the love is real you gotta' let yourself go,
Just to bring it back.
Sometimes,
Just to bring it back.
I've let you down you've lost your taste,
I'm losing ground I fall from grace.
Well just listen,
Sometimes,
Sometimes,
Sometimes,
YOU GOTTA' SET FREE WHAT YOU LOVE JUST TO BRING IT BACK!
WOULD YOU EVER LOSE ME?
WOULD YOU EVER LET GO FOR THAT?
And if the love is real you gotta' teach yourself,
Just to bring it back.
Sometimes,
Just to bring it back.
Oh the love you're bringing back.
Oh the love you're bringing back.
Sometimes,
Sometimes,
Just to bring it back.
You gotta' let go.

Supernatural High

So, I wouldn't blog about this unless it seemed super weird, and maybe this isn't weird to anyone else but me, but it's weird.

so the other day I got an e-mail about being eligible for an honor's fraternity. I was reading through the names just to see if I knew anyone else, oddly enough I was grouped with a bunch of people from my high school, which I thought was rather strange. Short and short, i saw someone's name that had went to like conneticut for college, and I was like wow she doesn't go here, unless she transferred. So, I went to class and after class I am walking down the hall and SEE HER, the fact I just read that e-mail less than 2 hours ago, and then saw her (and I haven't seen her since the day we graduated high school together). I see her again yesterday, and decide to say hello.

SO, that was odd, but I guess possible.

SOOOO, tonight I was just randomly facebook stalking old high school people. It was weird how much just seeing these people flashbacked me back to high school, feeling the same, it was horrible haha. Anyways, I found someone's myspace I hadn't seen since the day we graduated high school also. Anywho, Bex and I went to Bangor tonight, wal-mart, then Denny's, it was all very random and all very late. We are leaving denny's after eating, and I see someone who looks familiar but different, i do a double take and then I turn back around, then I hear my name, it was the VERY PERSON i saw on facebook. We talked for a few moments, small chat kind of stuff.

Seriously though, CREEPY, It's like I see people in some online kind of way then I see them in real life, some weird manifestation destiny (not to be confused with manifest destiny). Anyways, I just thought I would share my creepy experience.

very surreal kind of supernatural type feelings...

The Last Machine

IT'S BEEN A FEW DAYS. I spent the weekend watching movies galore, 7 to be exact. I need to watch a lot of movies to fit my goal of averaging a movie a day per watching time!

I am so excited about Stever stuff happening. She is redesigning her myspace tomorrow, which should be pretty swanky. She sent me a cool email today, she thought it was funny i said i was like an alternative sherlock holmes. I sent out her bday gift today, hope she likes it, I really want to be part of her music, its so deep and emotion, it scratches at the core of the bones in the body!

Anyways. I hung out with bex tonight, that was fun. We went to see Mr. Woodcock, which was funny and a little "oh my god, he didn't just do that", but overall good. We talked about life, and we still are. Seems like everyone is having tragedies of decision-making lately. I guess it's that time of the Fall, ya know? (me neither)

I don't have too much to blog about, at first I thought I did, but I mostly don't now. I dismantled New Media Society, because last meeting no one showed up, and it's dwindled since meeting one, so take that NMS! Oh well, I can put on my resume that I was president , so there. I mean I did try, i posted, came up with ideas, i played the role of all 4 positions. Oh well.

My piercings are doing well for the most part, they are kind of scabby and red, but i think it's normal, i wish i knew. I emailed Orrin to find out, he hasn't gotten back to me yet, but i mean its not painful or swollen or pussing, so I'm feeling good about them. I love them !

WELL, I shall let go for now.